Aphorisms Galore!

Doug Horton

Aphorisms Attributed to This Aphorist

tiny.ag/lkeuhfbn  ·  submitted 1997

If food were free, why work?

Doug Horton, in Work and Recreation

tiny.ag/hjysnvry  ·  submitted 1997

If it looks like shit, smells like shit, mail it to your enemy -- he'll know what to do with it.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/vpchszet  ·  submitted 1997

If the destination is heaven, why do we scramble to be first in line for hell?

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/93thhysu  ·  submitted 1997

If wishes were fishes we'd all be throwing nets. If wishes were horses we'd all ride.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/hd1r4yfi  ·  submitted 1997

If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure

tiny.ag/bggvrf05  ·  submitted 1997

If you love something, turn it loose. If it doesn't come back, kill it!

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism and Love and Hate

tiny.ag/cfxqwrve  ·  submitted 1997

It's not a question of happiness, it's a requirement. Consider the alternative.

Doug Horton, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/cqhmzryv  ·  submitted 1997

Life is good when we think it's good. Life is bad when we don't think.

Doug Horton, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/h3ssnixk  ·  submitted 1997

Happiness in the present is only shattered by comparison with the past.

Doug Horton, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/jesbzwxp  ·  submitted 1997

As the fly bangs against the window attempting freedom while the door stands open, so we bang against death ignoring heaven.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/bnnutdd7  ·  submitted 1997

Be your own hero, it's cheaper than a movie ticket.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/j0vq6ox3  ·  submitted 1997

Beauty is variable, ugliness is constant.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/9n0oa4te  ·  submitted 1997

Being sorry is the highest act of selfishness, seeing value only after discarding it.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/ooxlc4p0  ·  submitted 1997

Boring people are a reflection of boring people.

Doug Horton, in Altruism and Cynicism

tiny.ag/ojpztwu9  ·  submitted 1997

Born a saint, die a sinner -- born a sinner, die a saint.

Doug Horton, in Vice and Virtue

tiny.ag/o7wo0x8t  ·  submitted 1997

Born to be wild -- live to outgrow it.

Doug Horton, in Life and Death

tiny.ag/nvdb2cfz  ·  submitted 1997

Burning desire is the eternal flame.

Doug Horton, in Love and Hate

tiny.ag/vtq15sgk  ·  submitted 1997

Action cures fear, inaction creates terror.

Doug Horton, in Success and Failure